Struggles with Infertility

My Pregnancy Journey

We decided to start trying for a baby shortly after my 29th birthday.  A woman automatically thinks that they will become pregnant as soon as they are ready.  Even though we were both ready emotionally and financially, it just wasn't happening for us.  Here we were 7 months later, still no baby.  I had my annual doctors appointment at the gynecologist that month in December.   I was told that my hormones were out of balance and I was not ovulating.  My options were that I could wait it out and see if things get back to normal, or I could start infertility treatments. The chances of getting pregnant were very slim.  After the initial shock and a week straight of crying, I did the only thing I could do, I prayed.

I asked God to give me the strength and the knowledge to know what to do.  I decided that I would put it in God's hands and what he wanted would happen.  I began to redirect my day into exercising and trying very hard not to focus on having a baby.  That following March I had notice I hadn't had a period yet, it had been 40 some days.  I spoke with my husband and we decided to take a pregnancy test.  As we waited those long excruciating minutes my heart was racing.  As I looked down at the bathroom counter grief filled my heart as I seen the words flash on the screen "not pregnant".

One week later, my husband came home from work.  He had a concerned look on his face and I didn't know what could be going on.  He sat me down and proceeded to tell me that he was told he might be deploying.  Through my mind I tell myself, we knew this would happen, we will have time to prepare for his departure.  I started going through my head what all I would need to do for our first deployment.  Then the shocker came, if it happened, it would be in the next 48 hours.